Dear hubby,
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever.. I’ve been a good woman to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it.
These last 2 weeks have been hell..
Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was thelast straw. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut,had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk dress.You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of yourgames. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want anythingthat connects us as husband & wife. Either you are cheating on me or youdon’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone.
Your EX-Wife
P.S. Don’t try to find me. Your BROTHER & I are moving away to WestVirginia together! Have a great life!
_________________________________________
FOLLOWING IS THE RESPONSE FROM THE HUSBAND
Dear Ex-Wife
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.
It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good woman is afar cry from what you’ve been. I watch my games so much because they drownout your constant whining & gripe Too bad that doesn’t work. I DID noticewhen you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was‘You look just like a boy!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anythingif you can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked myfavorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because Istopped eating pork 7 years ago.. About those new silk dress: I turned awayfrom you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it wasa coincidence that my brother had just borrowed $50 fromme that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out.. So when Ihit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 ticketsto Jamaica But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for areason, I guess.
I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said thatthe letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me.
So take care.
Signed,Your Ex-Husband, Rich As Hell & Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my brother Carl was born asCarla(woman) ……… .I hope that’s not a problem
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