How Do I Get My Passion Back

This thought just sprang in my mind out of the blue last Friday evening and threw me headlong into a quagmire of introspection. Introspection can be a huge quagmire especially if you have been in a blissful state of denial for as long as I have. So what's all this about losing my passion? In my reflective mood I came up with the following:

• Start all over learning again.

That when asked what do you enjoy or like as someone recently did on twitter, I cannot answer as readily as I did at the beginning of this year. This despite the fact that the very first post I wrote on this blog last January (and a couple after that) was based on the things that made me happy. I thought at that time, I know myself very well now; I’ve finally come into myself at 35. In fact I knew myself so well that if you woke me up from a deep sleep and asked me what I loved most, I could in half sleep mode give you a list of at least twenty things that made me deliriously happy. But alas, that is no more.

• Archives are my only point of reference.

 To remember what I was passionate about I only have to look at the archives of this blog and doing that makes me want drown myself in a sea of my own tears.
For one thing I lost my flair in my blog writing. I used to love blogging here and I found my topics exciting and i think so did my readers. I blogged about my personal life, other people’s lives, hobbies, whatever; you name it I could write about it. But now with so little inspiration I’ve been using my review blog as my escape. And the lack of exciting content here is too telling.

• Just a writer wannabe

The less I posted, the less I wrote.  Every time I sit in front of my laptop now all I come up with is a blank Microsoft Word page. It’s been a 7 months long writer’s drought. I've even gotten to the stage where I convinced myself that writing is meant for my blog/writer friends who know what they’re doing.  Me helping them with reviews and interviews and promoting their books is have doing my bit. The road to perdition is paved with good intentions **shoulders slump/ heavy sigh escapes**

*******

Before I work myself into an irreversible catatonic depression let me say the following i defense  This has been a very hard rollercoaster year for my family and all the perils we met I suspect just knocked the spontaneity, laughter and energy out of me. There is only so much that one can share with friends and the behind the scenes catastrophes that took place this year have been unmentionable.

But I really want my passion back. I want to feel energized by invisible forces again, feel like the world is my oyster and that I’m the queen bee. I miss feeling invincible. Well they say the first step to recovery is admitting there’s a problem, I now have. The question is, where do you go to recover your passion? I sense another self –examination session on the way but if you, my wise friend, have suggestions for shortcuts to the RECOVER YOUR PASSION counter, i’d more than love to hear them.....

Remember to check me out on Friday for the Poetry feature ok?
Oh, and I'm retrying to improve my blog ranking for my book reviews so be a babe and download my toolbar onto your Mozilla or IE. Fabulosity Reads Toolbar
Check you later!