Is there a such thing as the perfect life??

I think for so long, I have longed for the perfect life. I think this is why it took me so long in my adult life to allow myself to just be happy. Live in the "Now" and be happy. I was always seeking perfection (In my looks, my career, my family etc) I could never rest and relax because I was striving for perfection so much that I always felt anxious.
It took me a long time to realize that I had to stop living for the future and just live for today.
Focus on the present and make your time and life better now rather than always working towards tomorrow.
Honestly, how do you even know there will be a tomorrow? LIVE NOW.

and that is my inspiration to start this coming week off the right way.

Inspirational Thought for the Day

CALMNESS IN OUR LIVES






I am passing this on to you because it definitely works, and we could all use a little more calmness in our lives. By following simple advice heard on the Dr. Phil show, you too can find inner peace. Dr Phil proclaimed, "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started and have never finished."




So, I looked around my house to see all the things I started and hadn't finished, and before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of White Zinfandel, a bottle of Bailey's Irish Cream, a package of Oreos, the remainder of my old Prozac prescription, the rest of the cheesecake, some Doritos, and a box of chocolates, and a half bottle of scotch.



You have no idea how freaking good I feel right now.

Pass this on to those whom you think might be in need of inner peace.

The quality of relationships and friendships

The quality of your relationships has alot to do with your own self-acceptance and self-esteem.  Raising them tends to automatically raise the quality of your relationships

Accepting yourself for who you are automatically improves your life to a certain degree

The above quotes are what I am studying now.  I have been feeling so good.  Life is going so right for me right now  (almost too good that it makes me nervous)   If you have followed this blog from the beginning, you know I have had some bad days since I started my journey to a happier, more fulfilling life.  LOL. 

I don't know what to say other than when you change people , places and things and your way of thinking (and believe me, that is the toughest part)  I still battle everyday with my inner self.  I feel like I have that little devil on one shoulder and the little angel on the other and my mind is right between them.  I feel the best that I have in years.  and I am being so honest with that.  (Now, don't get me wrong, I am consistently reading self help books)  I have read probably about 10 in the past couple months.

Oddly enough, the better I feel, the more people want to be around me.  I never realized how many people truly like me and love to be around me.  My goodness, My text messaging goes off all day long anymore.  I realize now that people do truly love to be around me. 

Of course, I have changed some of my own relationships.  There were a few people in my life that I feel brought me down and I have since distanced myself from those people and you know what I just feel better.  I can't describe.  The energy, the happier and the overall just improvement in the quality of my life.

Don't get me wrong, I still have bad days but I have good relationships and friendships in my life now and that is so important.

Since I can't ever change the past, have to just work on changing the future  :-)

inspirational Motivatio

Why does it take a tradgedy for people to realize what really matters in life? Dont take what you have for granted it might not be there tomorrow and that will be a real tradgedy!

I really don't have much to type about tonight but I don't want to just type when I have bad days (especially when I search so hard for the inner peace)  The hard part is I type more when I am doing bad.  LOL< the more I study, the more I work at it, the better things are so I don't feel as much to vent

That isn't how I want it;  I want us all to travel together.  I am going to have my really positive weeks but I am also going to have my setbacks  :-(
Let's do a motivational quote.  I still feel that if everyone did this every day  (when you get up, you set a motivation for the day)  people would be in better moods so here is just a tad of motivation

There is only one success......... to be able to spend your life in your own way

Maryland Crabs are the BEST- Good week this week

A very good week for me so far.  Everything going on an emotionally good level.  My insomnia issues even seem to be getting better somewhat.  I think this self help journey is helping me.  I haven't had any wine at all this week   LOL.  Not that I have ever been an alcoholic but there have been quite a few times that I have drank wine to help me calm down or sleep.  I am feeling good.  I have enjoyed my time this week.  Although I have been somewhat busy building my partylite business  (I am enjoying doing that also)  These home shows are fun. We play games, I meet new people and make money for just having a party.  It's pretty cool.  There is NO Stress  (Unlike my full time job that will probably end me up in the nutty bin if I don't get out of there  :-(
Me, my daughter, my fiance and my co-worker and her husband went out for crabs tonight.  They were so good and had the best seasoning so that was a nice little get together
I made money in the stock market  (so that made me happy)  
Spent alot of good time with my daughter (that makes me happy)

I don't just want to post about my bad days  :-(   As this is my journal of  my journey

Inspirational quote for the day  
Thank God every morning when you get up that you have something to do which must be done  :-)
Busier people don't have time to be unhappy    That is what I am learning.  

Chicken Soup to Inspire

"Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood"

"Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation"

"Aging forces us to decide what is important in life"  
(The truth in this statement is frightening  :-)

Oh- What a day- Everyday is a journey

My life--  Wow, sometimes I feel like it could be one big reality TV show.  The only difference, it is real, I'm not rich and not getting paid for sharing it  LOL  (again, this is my free therapy)
This is my journey, my real journey in self help.  Everyday can seem like a real challenge. 
There is an old saying "somedays, you eat the bear and somedays, the bear eats you"  The damn bear got me today 
I wake up this morning  (that's a good thing)  I get ready for work and take my daughter to my mom's for the day.  My mom was off today so she babysat.  I go to get in my car from my mom's and the car wont start  (battery died)  so I borrow my mom's car.   On the way to work, I accidentally hit the seat heat on in her car and have no idea how to turn it off.  Riding to work for 22 minutes with the seat making my butt sweat.  (note:  It is summer where I live and has been very hot)  so I get to work and my dress slacks are literally wet on my backside because of the heated seat  (which is leather)
Than I go into the negative office I work in (which if you read my previous blog posts) than you know that I work in a negative office where you have 40 and 50 year old adults throwing temper tantrums and are constant pessimists and I had to get every customer today that took nasty pills  (Seriously, is it necessary to be so nasty to people).  I get yelled at for their real estate taxes increasing  (Note:  We are the mortgage company, I just want to scream  "call your congressman, call your county)  8 hours at that office felt like 20. 
So needless to say, I came home in bad mood   (frowns)
Than, I subbed on my step dads bowling team tonight.  I haven't bowled in a few months.  Didn't bowl too bad   172, 169, 189.  OK  Average 177 (so not bad) but I got a good laugh.  The team was doing bad and there is a little elderly gentleman that bowled on the team and he would get so mad everytime he got an open that he would curse and slap his ears.  I could do nothing but laugh  (not where he could hear me though haha)  I was scared that he might come slap my ears too  LOl

but at least, I laughed.  :-)

With all the stress today (plus I have gained a few pounds since I quit smoking 3 1/2 months ago)  I can feel it in my clothes, I was feeling a bit sorry for myself today.  :-(
Even though, my life is good right now compared to so many others out there

Everyday is a mental journey to me.  I often feel people take advantage of my niceness.  I really need to work on the healthy selfishness bit.

I am feeling a bit stressed tonight.  My mom hasn't been in good health recently  (If you read my previous posts than you know about the cancer and her past life)  She is such a great person.  I am taking her to get an endoscopy tomorrow.  Keep her in your prayers for me.

I have had too much loss in my life and my mom is truly the wind beneath my wings.  She has survived a hard life but is yet one of the sweetest, kindest people you can meet.

I hope all is OK.  She has lost like 40 pounds in 6 months.  She is looking frail.  She has had alot of tests done recently and nothing is coming back wrong.  Hopefully, the endoscopy shows us something.  I feel something is not right and very worried. 

Cross your fingers for me



Somedays are good, somedays are bad but in all honesty, nobody really wants to hear about my hardships.  Only when I am joking and laughing.  That is why I love writing on this blog.  I can just talk. Nobody has to read it but I feel I talked about it and it helps me.  It is the diary of my life  (kind of like the diary of a madman)  only I am female

Smiles-  Good Nite All

If you really knew me

Wow, I am watching this show right now on MTV called If you really knew me. I think this is the season premiere of it.  It is so powerful in words.
"If you really knew me"  What a powerful quote that is

For a bunch of great inspirational quotes, visit the home page of the blog
Here is the link

or if you just feel like laughing tonight, check out my blog with funny facebook jokes Here is the link

Awesome Rest and Recharge Day

I had a do nothing day today  :-)  I actually watched about 12 episodes of the show of Teen Mom on MTV.  That was an awesome show.  My daughter watched a few episodes with me.  She will be 12 in September and I think that is a great show for young girls to watch
There are too many babies having babies in the world and hopefully, the show helps younger girls realize that parenthood is hard and helps to promote abstinence and safe sex

Still working on getting the partylite business kicked off. 

"Life is not about finding yourself, it is about creating yourself"

Found this one today and it is very true

Joy of Summertime and watching children play

My daughter has a friend sleeping over tonight. It is one of her best girlfriends from school. They haven't seen each other in like a month so the talking and giggling is nonstop (LOL- Instant headache) They have been swimming all night. We ordered some pizzas and getting ready to settle in for a movie shortly.

Nothing brings me more joy than seeing huge smiles on my daughter's face.

This is my motivation for the day. Watching my baby enjoy her childhood and making good memories.

Have a great weekend   (My daughter and her bff night swimming)    So much fun!!!!!

Hard to find balance with an overwhelming smell of deviled eggs

Hard to find balance with an overwhelming smell of deviled eggs

Goofy post huh?? Wouldn't be if you were at my house right now. We are having an office party (customer appreciation) at work tomorrow and I just had to make 4 dozen of deviled eggs ARGHHH. If I smell another egg tonight, I am going to seriously puke LOL Don't get me wrong. I love deviled eggs but I wont be able to eat them for a while now

Hard to keep a level, balanced head when egg smell clogs you up but I am going to try tonight.

I am still on studying my unlived life so that is where tonights inspirational motivation hails from. From all the research I have been doing and just different motivational soul searching mental exercises, I have self diagnosed myself with a trust issue. I think I have had so much hurt and disappointment in younger years that I have a very hard time letting people get too close to me. I have lots of friends but I always have that barrier.
How do I get past that? How do I let go of those insecurities?

The following are my goals:
to surrender old limitations

Enhance friendships, family and career

Mastering the art of feeling truly alive in the present needs and respecting and caring for my own inner needs (back to healthy selfishness)

Everyday I work at the inner peace thing, I exercise more, I try to remove myself from stressful situations and not dwell but the more I work at this, the more it feels like a job.

How can it just flow naturally

Finding yourself in today's complicated world

Answer the following questions

What are your strengths?

What do you love about yourself?

What do you stand for?

What do you love most about your family and kids?

What do you love most about you?

Who is the best you?

Write a description of who you are. Write your own story.
When you read your own story, do you focus on the positive and negative? Do you dwell on your strengths or your weaknesses? What is your perspective?

Now go back and rewrite your story.

Happiness begins when you learn to accept the fact that you are loved and valued for who you are, not what you do

Inspirational Quote of the Day

"Everything depends upon execution; having just a vision is no solution."

You can say the word NO and feel good about it

We go back to healthy selfishness
No is a very simple word. A complete sentence actually. No is one of the shortest words in the english language, yet one of the most difficult for people to say (especially women) Why is it so much easier agree sometimes than to just say what we are really feeling NO!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think saying no for us women sometimes is so hard because of our deeply rooted need for connection. We want to be considerate without jeopardizing the relationships we value or perhaps we are too concerned with being liked or valued

Again, Healthy selfishness is imperative

Looking for love in all the wrong places

Suppose you fall in love with someone outside of your marriage. I am helping a friend through this right now. She is married with 2 children. She has been with her husband for 10 years (She was 20, he 35) when they met. Her children are 7 and 3. She is 30, he 45 now
She had advanced tremendously in her career and as she has grown both emotionally and financially, he has become settled and lazier. She is a mortgage loan officer and had an affair with the owner of her previous company. This has been going on for 6 months (the affair was exposed and her husband does know) He is angry but is so in love with her that he wont leave
Her life is like one big epidode of sex in the city right now.
and the bad part is that I don't think she truly deep inside wants to end her marriage because there is an insecurity there (although, she is very attractive, witty, smart and very successful) She still has insecurities. When she confided that in me, I was a bit surprised because on the outside, she alludes confidence and security.
I think she wants her cake and wants to eat it too. She wants her husband and kids at home but she wants the boyfriend and the excitement also.
She has outgrown her marriage. She feels so guilty inside

God made us all with erotic desires. It is a reality of life. People have affairs everyday. Is it right, Is it moral? We all know the answer is no but does it happen? of course, it does

I think she knows that even if she ended the affair, her marriage could never go back to the way it was. The trust wouldn't be there. Also, if it wasn't this guy that she had an affair with, it probably would have been someone else

Why? not because she is a tramp (she definately isn't) but she was unhappy, there was a huge void

The actions of both her and her lover broke up 2 marriages (whereas children are involved on both sides) has caused alot of damage but yet him and her are still drawn to each other and can't stay away from each other.

I have been doing alot of reading to try and help her (as that is me, I love to help others find solutions to their problems) so I read all about healthy alternatives and ways she could have changed her marriage but than in other books, I read people don't really change unless they want to. So even if she changed, her husband would want to change to.

I think that females that settle down too young have too much of unlived life (which could cause bad decisions to be made)

It is so easy to judge people that have affairs but unless you were in their situation and walked in their shoes, you probably shouldn't judge

There is no perfect person

Has anyone had a similar experience to the one I shared?

Also, I am going to be honest with you here! If you found this blog because you did a search within a search engine for looking for love in all the wrong places, you are in the wrong blog. You should be visiting my relationship blog reading about the stages of a relationship
Here is the link if you wish to read a little more :-)

Of if you just want to laugh, check out my funny facebook status update blog
funniest facebook statuses
Enjoy

What is happiness?

What is happiness?

Start a happiness diary.Write down all the time you feel happy and give the reason if you can work it out. You will discover things about your own happiness that will astonish you.

If you feel extremely happy, you are extremely happy but here is something interesting to remember. If you feel fed up or depressed, you may not be as low as you think. When depressed people are asked to keep a "happiness diary" Keeping a note of everytime they feel happy and why. They can often fill the entire page a day

Motivational Inspiration for the Day

Hi all. What is going to be our motivational quotes of the day

Things to remember and try to focus on
* Relationships are the single most important source of human happiness
* Don't "play games" in your relationship
* Don't be judgemental
* Don't project your feelings onto your partner but love the reality. Acceptance is the key to a happy relationship

What did you do today? I took my daughter (she's a tween LOL) to see Eclipse (the third movie of the Twilight series. Ultimate love story. I look forward to seeing these movies. (Only my daughter switched teams on me, I am still team Edward, she jumped ship to Team Jacob

I loved the part whereas Bella was saying how she didn't want to live a normal life because she wasn't normal :-) Makes you thing

I also loved the part where Charlie (the dad) was trying to discuss sex with Bella (haha)That was great

On the way home in the car, my soon to be 12 year old was talking about Jacob having 8 pack abs (what the heck) First, It was always 6 pack abs. I guess 8 pack abs is modern age (we always want more LOL) than I find myself in the conversation with her about the importance of having value in yourself and saving yourself etc (the whole talk thing) I was so unprepared for that one
so than an awkward silence so than finally I just had to say
Courtney, always remember the old saying- Why buy the milk if you can get the cow for free. She looked at me like I had 10 heads and another awkward silence LOL
I think I need to get better prepared for teenage years haha

(of course, there is now a better saying for women why buy the entire pig for a little sausage) Not going to say that to her of course

Anyhow, have a wonderful night

Remember to laugh everyday

Get the life you deserve without the guilt

Join me for my own journey in finding and keeping the inner peace

Much better today

Ok so feeling much better today. Spending the evening last night reading really helped me put things back into focus.
Don't have alot of time this evening. I have my unit meeting for my partylite business so have to run. My fiance is growling at me because I am sort of forcing him to go to meeting with me. He is supposed to be helping me with this side business but how can you help with a business if you don't know what the business is selling LOL. Of course, he wont be doing the home shows and presentations, I will but he needs to know something about the business to market it duh!!!!!!!!!!!!!! haha. He can be sharp as a beachball sometimes

but just a question and thought for the day

What is the story you are telling yourself about what is happening in your life? What is the reality?

That is something I am struggling with a bit lately. Especially with the upcoming wedding and I think I have a total fear of total committment

My life has been too complicated LOL I think I should write a book

Maybe I just have a trust issue

As time goes on and I get more comfortable with my inner feelings, I will share more.

If I don't get back on tonight, hope all have a wonderful evening.

Little Breakdown

I had a little breakdown last night :-( so I need double inspiration today (as I am feeling blue)
Spent the day today stressed and anxious so I had to read double today on Healthy Selfishness
Healthy selfishness is a way of thinking and acting in which there is a deep appreciation, compassion, and concern for yourself- by yourself
** Respect your feelings, desires and needs
**trust in yourself, believe in your self. Trust in your own ability and experience
**accept your weaknesses and imperfections without guilt
**Always encourage yourself

Whenver I am down, I love reading about inspiration and just looking up joke. It makes me feel better

It hurts when someone you think is your friend, stabs you in the back

But as my 89 year old boss (who is a very wise woman) always tells me "You will go through your whole life and by the time you are done, you will be able to count your true friends on one hand"
The older I am getting, the more truth I see in that.

She told me this story one time about a woman she knew who died. The woman had pre bought her grave site and premade her funeral arrangements and she gave the funeral parlor a sealed envelope and they were instructed that whenever she died, they needed to open the envelope and put it with the guest book that people signed

The letter said "Where have you been for the past 20 years and if you didn't have time to see me before, don't waste your time now"

I don't really tell the story, the way she tells it because she tells it so well. You get the gist of the meaning though

Healthy selfishness is the key that opens the door to a life of freedom: freedom from being ruled by opinions and demands of others. Freedoms from the voices within your mind, leftovers from your childhook that in the past may have judged and blamed you.

Self Image and Self Esteem How do they fit together?

There is a time in our lives when both our self image and our self esteem are determined by other people. When we are little, our lives are dominated by adults and older kids. We see ourselves as they tell us we are. Good messages, good self-image and vice versa with Bad messages. We respond to what we hear the most. We form a picture of who we are and build our image around that. We tend to become that
As we get older, we need to realize that we have a choice who we become. We mold our ownselves.