Monday, February 6, 2012

COUNTDOWN TO GREATNESS

8 hrs

***

snorting coke off a key, smoking shorts laced with P
sporting gold on my teeth, getting leafed as a tree
got that Minnie Mouse cheese, straight Swiss currency
so if the money dirty, can’t take it from me
these bitches acting mean like a stray Siamese
but scurry down the alley when the trigger finger squeeze
now they’re bleeding from the knees--begging baby please
honking like some geese on Thanksgiving Eve

***

"You Are Big I Am Tiny" from He Is Talking To The Fat Lady by xTx

You are big. Very big. So big with your girth. Your infinite waistline. Your hea that hit the sky. I cannot comprehend you as a whole, just pieces: fingers, knee, shirt sleeve.

I am tiny. Very tiny. So tiny with my shortness. My baby legs. My head skimming undersides of coffee tables. You could put me into your mouth and I could live there.

It comes at me fast. You catch my side with your foot. I fly. I fly up into the sky; past your head, past the roof, past the T in the telephone pole, over the courthouse, over the church steeple. The ground blurs and the sky is in my mouth. My side hurts with broken ribs and a crushed lung, but I ignore the pain because I am flying. Flying! Just like every bird I've ever chased!

I land in a deep well and die. My one working lung fills with brackish water. You find me like a kite runner. You call my name. It echos against the old stones and settles in my dead ears. Your tears rain down, useless. You cannot even try to save me as your size dwarfs the mouth of the well, open and laughing at your loss.

I float upwards. Becoming.

The angels giggle and put me into their pockets. They tie me to their wings.


"Something Pure and Good" from I Don't Respect Female Expression by Frank Hinton

Put your face on my face. I want to feel the pressure of your face on my face. Not just your lips but your nose. Not just your lips and your nose but your cheeks and your chin and your forehead and your eyes. I want your face to become my face. I want to spin around with you, two bodies and one head. I want to create a machine with our tongues revolving around one another.

The last time we did it, it was really rough. He put his hand over my mouth and turned my head to the side. He pinned me in one position and I was to remain there. I kept whispering the words "playground equipment" into his palm and I can taste his palm in my mouth right now as I think about all of this.

I feel so good when I lock a screen door. I don't like it when people serve me food. I am nervous at a house party. I secretly hope for blood every time I blow my nose. There used to be a place I could go where I felt safe. I can't remember anymore. I think the place was made of wood.

Here is something good and pure and already I'm looking for a way to reject it.

***

Jahaziel Minor


EARTHY ANECDOTE by Wallace Stevens

Every time the bucks went clattering
Over Oklahoma
A firecat bristled in the way.

Wherever they went,
They went clattering,
Until they swerved
In a swift, circular line
To the right,
Because of the firecat.

Or until they swerved
In a swift, circular line
To the left,
Because of the firecat.

The bucks clattered.
The firecat went leaping,
To the right, to the left,
And
Bristled in the way.

Later, the firecat closed his bright eyes
And slept.

***

Lil B - I Own Swag


this is one of the first songs from Based God that I actually could see being a radio hit and getting played everywhere like Look At Me Now or a Drake song or something

***

MY LIST OF REALLY GOOD CONTEMPORARY AMERICAN WRITERS WHO ARE 40 OR OLDER:
James Purdy (rip) / Denis Johnson / Thomas Pynchon / William T. Vollmann / Philip K Dick / Cormac McCarthy / Joan Didion / David Foster Wallace (rip) / Joy Williams / Breece Pancake (rip) / George Saunders / Kurt Vonnegut (rip) / Raymond Carver (rip) / Gordon Lish / Barry Hannah (rip) / Brian Evenson / Robert Coover / Nicholson Baker / Amy Hempel / Dennis Cooper / Diane Williams / Don Delillo / John Barth / Stephen Millhauser / Mary Gaitskill / Dagoberto Gilb / Marilynne Robinson / Stephen Dixon / Jonathan Lethem / Anne Tyler / Gary Lutz / Deborah Eisenberg / Dave Eggers / Chris Adrian / Sam Lipsyte / Philip Roth / Lydia Davis / Russell Banks / Jeffrey Eugenides / Joyce Carol Oates / Joseph McElroy / James Ellroy / Vendela Vida / Harlan Ellison / Ray Bradbury / Carole Maso / TC Boyle / Annie Proulx / Anne Carson / Rick Moody / Helen DeWitt / Michael Chabon / David Markson (rip) / William Gass / Donald Barthleme (rip) / Stanley Elkin (rip) / ZZ Packer / Aleksandar Hemon / Colm Toibin / Edwidge Danticat / Thomas M. Disch (rip) / John Hawkes (rip) / Jonathan Franzen / Kathy Acker / Paul Auster / David Mamet / Tony Kushner / Edward Albee / Padgett Powell / Aimee Bender / Ben Marcus / William Gibson / Lorrie Moore / Richard Price / Stuart Dybek / Jim Shepard / Charles D'Ambrosio

***

Ben Gazzara RIP (1930-2012)

Buffalo 66 (singing Fools Rush In)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2yWEs74FsIM

The Killing of a Chinese Bookie "ya gotta work hard to be comfortable...the only people who are...y'know, happy? Are the people who are comfortable."


The Killing of a Chinese Bookie "IS IT THE PARIS NUMBER? THE PARIS NUMBER! FOR CHRIST SAKES YA BEEN AT THE PLACE FOR SEVEN YEARS, YA DON'T KNOW WHAT THE PARIS NUMBER IS? WELL ARE THERE SIGNS ON THE WALL, P A R..."


The Killing of a Chinese Bookie (pool scene)


Tales of Ordinary Madness (reciting 'Style')


STYLE by Charles Bukowski

Style is the answer to everything.
A fresh way to approach a dull or dangerous thing
To do a dull thing with style is preferable to doing a dangerous thing without it
To do a dangerous thing with style is what I call art

Bullfighting can be an art
Boxing can be an art
Loving can be an art
Opening a can of sardines can be an art

Not many have style
Not many can keep style
I have seen dogs with more style than men,
although not many dogs have style.
Cats have it with abundance.

When Hemingway put his brains to the wall with a shotgun,
that was style.
Or sometimes people give you style
Joan of Arc had style
John the Baptist
Jesus
Socrates
Caesar
GarcĂ­a Lorca.

I have met men in jail with style.
I have met more men in jail with style than men out of jail.
Style is the difference, a way of doing, a way of being done.
Six herons standing quietly in a pool of water,
or you, naked, walking out of the bathroom without seeing me.

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